For people who feel irritable, reactive, resentful, or who shut anger down until it leaks out
Many people I see for anger issues are not “angry people”. They are often high-functioning, responsible, and skilled at holding things together until irritability, resentment, outbursts, or emotional shutdown start affecting relationships, work, or health.
I offer anger therapy in Central London (W1 / W1W) and online, working with adults whose anger is maintained by pressure, inhibition, boundary difficulties, and avoidance of underlying feelings, not simply “bad temper”.
My work integrates evidence-based approaches including ISTDP, CBT, and psychodynamic therapy, with a strong focus on how the pattern is maintained in the present, and how it can change.
When anger isn’t just “anger”
Anger problems often show up as:
- Irritability and snapping over small things
- Feeling constantly “on edge” or easily triggered
- Resentment from over giving or people-pleasing
- Explosive anger followed by guilt or shame
- Emotional shutdown and passive aggression
- Conflict avoidance until you can’t take it anymore
In these cases, anger often has a function, protecting boundaries, signalling unfairness, or covering more vulnerable feelings.
The anger cycle (how it keeps going)
- Trigger (criticism, feeling controlled, being overlooked, unfairness)
- Internal reaction (anger rises + body activation)
- Strategy to manage it:
- suppress/overcontrol, “be reasonable”
- avoid conflict
- burst out
- withdraw and stew
- Short-term relief
- Long-term cost (resentment, relationship strain, shame)
- Anger returns faster and stronger next time
How ISTDP understands anger
From an ISTDP perspective, anger is often a healthy signal, but problems arise when:
- anger feels unsafe to experience or express
- it is blocked by guilt/shame
- it flips into anxiety or shutdown
- We focus on increasing emotional capacity so anger can be felt, understood, and used constructively (boundaries, clarity, assertiveness) rather than acted out or swallowed.
How therapy helps with anger
We work to:
- identify your anger triggers and early body signs
- reduce shame and “self-attack” after anger
- build assertiveness and boundary clarity
- work with the feelings anger often protects (hurt, fear, grief)
- translate emotional change into real-world communication
What sessions usually look like
Early sessions:
- clarify patterns (explosions vs suppression)
- map relational triggers and body responses
- Ongoing work:
- work directly with anger safely in session
- build tolerance for conflict and self-expression
- practise new responses outside therapy
Related ways I work
- ISTDP – for anger/shame/anxiety cycles and emotional inhibition
- CBT – for impulse patterns, rumination, and behavioural change
- Psychodynamic therapy – for longstanding relational roles
You may also find these pages helpful:
Frequently asked questions
Is anger always a problem?
No. Anger can be healthy. Therapy helps when anger is costly or hard to control.
What if I shut down rather than explode?
That’s common. Both patterns can be worked with.
Can anger be linked to anxiety?
Yes. When anger feels unsafe to express (fear of conflict, guilt, overcontrol), it often gets converted into anxiety and tension in the body. Therapy helps you recognise the cycle and respond differently.
Do you offer therapy in Central London?
Yes, in W1W and online.
Do you work with insurance?
Yes, see Fees & Insurance.
Next steps
If this description fits your experience, therapy can help you change the pattern, not just manage symptoms.
